Won Without Words
winning the marriage you desire through wisdom

Shari Popejoy


February 14, 2011

3 Reasons You Can Celebrate Valentine’s Day Without a Dozen Roses

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Written by: Shari Popejoy
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Now, I know that supposedly every woman loves roses. . . and I admit it that I love it when my husband remembers me thoughtfully . . . in any way.  But, come on, ladies — the over-inflated priced, pre-dead cut flowers are just a token.  They don’t necessarily mean anything.  And the absence of them doesn’t necessarily mean anything either.

What you really want is intimacy.  You want the roses because they are a reflection of the fact that he was thinking of you,  but this is just a day on the calendar, promoted by those who wish to profit by  husbands who will feel guilty if they don’t respond.  So, if you didn’t get, or are trying to prepare yourself that you’re not going to get roses again this year, let me give you a few reasons to celebrate anyway!

1.  You have someone with whom to share life.  Do not ever underestimate the value of having a partner friend.  It is a wonderful and special gift.  He might not always be what you want, dream of, or expect, but he is a warm and living, breathing man, who has expectations, too.  Let him be human, and love him as he deserves.  If you’re having trouble with this one, take some roses to a widow today.

2.  Tomorrow is a new day.  You can change the future by changing your attitude today. I can almost guarantee you that if you do a few simple things every day for the next 364 days, you will get roses next year (if you decide that you really want them after all!).  In fact, I’m so convinced that my next post will be, “Three things you can do every day to make sure you get roses next Valentine’s Day!”

3.  Roses can’t talk, don’t hug, and could care less about your feelings.  Even if you think, “Great — they have something in common with my husband!”  I’m telling you, “It ain’t true!”  He just doesn’t know how to tell you.  He wants intimacy with you just as much as you want it with him.  Only problem is that husbands and wives experience intimacy in different ways.  He wants it physically; you want it emotionally.  If one partner is completely satisfied, it won’t be long until the other is, too.  Let it begin with you!

Do you want a guaranteed way to make sure he thinks about you today?  Find a way to let him know what is waiting for him tonight!  Believe me when I say that he wants intimacy more than you want roses.  Why?  Because it is the only way that a man feels emotionally connected with the woman that he loves and has committed himself to for life.  Did you know that the only time a man releases the “feel good hormone”, oxytocin, (the hormone that is secreted when a woman breastfeeds her baby) is after physical intercourse with the woman to whom he is married?

So, whether you get some pre-dried petals on a stem today or not, you have many reasons to celebrate!  Happy Valentines Day!


p.s.  Marc, thank you for making this Valentines Day one I’ll ‘remember’, and you know why!

Creative Commons License
Won Without Words by Shari Popejoy is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at blog.wonwithoutwords.com.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at http://www.injoyinc.com/.

About the Author

Shari Popejoy
Shari Popejoy is the author of the book Won Without Words, and the blog Won Without Words, encouragement to wives. She writes the Livingstone Library, an adventure series for young people, and the blog Oh Joy!, (injoyinc.com/oh/) for busy moms. She is a frequent contributor to Christian print and online magazines, and writes from the quiet country of the Ozarks, where she lives with her husband, Marc, and their three children. You can find out all about her at sharipopejoy.com!


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