Having fun with ‘100 Days to a Greater Marriage’?! Well, here’s a challenge that might be a little harder to accomplish. And not too fun. In fact, it might actually be a little painful to consider.
Love cannot reside where resentment abides.
Challenge # 6: Today, examine your heart. If there is unresolved bitterness, anger, offense or resentment, it’s time to let it go.
Seems so easy to say it. Harder to actually do it. However, it is a choice. We either choose to hold on to resentment, or we can choose to let it go.
And holding on to some things is just plain creepy — and it’s disastrous to hold onto and embrace some things. . . like gangrene. . . or Limburger cheese — or resentment. The stink of Limburger might linger annoyingly like your Aunt Ethel’s Channel #5, but gangrene can actually kill you. Resentment will kill the romance . . . and eventually the love in our marriage. So, no matter how terrible he’s been, let go of that putrid offense of resentment today.
Resentment is just a symptom of unforgiveness.
So, if you are harboring resentment, consider what you are not willing to forgive. . . For some of you, he might have left the lid up on the toilet, for others, it’s a much deeper betrayal.
The remedy is the same — love covers a multitude of sins (Proverbs 10:12, I Peter 4:8), but love cannot be present where resentment has taken up abode. They are incompatible roommates.
Do not think about his transgressions or his faults. Do not replay them over and over in your mind. Do not dwell on it. Do not cherish the offense. Don’t cuddle up to it and embrace it. Choose to forgive. Choose to love. Choose to move on. It’s a tall order for just day six, but I know we can all do it with some intentional effort.
And now, we all have some packing up to do. There comes a time. . . when you have to let things go. It’s time to clean house — or at least throw out that stinky Limburger and that odoriferous offense. It’s time to kick the bum out (and you know I’m talking about the resentment)!
If your coffee’s not cold — and you’re not too hot about this post — join us for a little journal jotting —
- If you need a little incentive to forgive, read I John 4:11. In fact, read the whole chapter, because verse 20 is pretty good, too!
- Is there something that you just can’t forgive or that is weighing on you with a burden of resentment toward your husband? Write it down on a slip of paper. Then open your Bible to Luke 23:34, place your slip of paper right there under Luke 23:34 and pray those words with Jesus.
- Write a prayer in your journal stating your need for help in forgiving, and thanking God for forgiving you, and state your resolve to learn to walk in love and forgiveness toward your husband — with God’s help, and Jesus’ example.