Won Without Words
winning the marriage you desire through wisdom

Shari Popejoy


April 3, 2012


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Written by: Shari Popejoy
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Husbands are commanded to love their wife.  Wives are commanded to respect their husband.

“Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”  Ephesians 5:33

In the original Greek, the word respect is phobeo, the word from which we get phobia.  That’s a pleasant thought!  Phobeo can mean to put to flight, or to be afraid — but it also means to reverence, venerate, to treat with deference, or reverential obedience (as in fear of the Lord).

The Amplified version of the Bible uses just four words to explain the love a husband should have for his wife in Ephesians 5:33, and yet it went into great detail to describe the respect a wife should show for her husband. . .

Let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates and esteems him, and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly].

The bracketed portion must have been translated by a man after a rough day with his wife!

But why is respect so important to a man?  Does it really matter why?  It just is!  God doesn’t ask us to respect our husband just to annoy us. He made our husbands, and he knows that respect is a very powerful motivator — even a necessity to our husband.  And God was kind enough to give us a little hint about the way our husbands operate in the Owner’s Manual of the Bible! Don’t ignore that helpful hint!

We should never belittle or put down or criticize or condemn our husband. He gets enough of that from life.  Be the one person who never disrespects him — ever, for as long as you both shall live.  Vow it.  Commit to it.  It is that important.

Today’s tip:  Respect your husband.  Notice him, regard him, honor him, prefer him, venerate him, esteem him, defer to him, praise him, love and admire him exceedingly.

You will be amazed at the power of your respect for him.  It’s like spinach to Popeye,  or the suit to Superman!

Go give your husband some superhuman strength!

  1. What are some of the ways that you disrespect your husband? Stop!
  2. How can you change your behavior so that your actions and attitude reflect respect for your husband?
  3. Pay attention to your tone,  your facial expressions, your demeanor when you speak to your husband. Are you more polite to a stranger?

About the Author

Shari Popejoy
Shari Popejoy is the author of the book Won Without Words, and the blog Won Without Words, encouragement to wives. She writes the Livingstone Library, an adventure series for young people, and the blog Oh Joy!, (injoyinc.com/oh/) for busy moms. She is a frequent contributor to Christian print and online magazines, and writes from the quiet country of the Ozarks, where she lives with her husband, Marc, and their three children. You can find out all about her at sharipopejoy.com!


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