How To Avoid The #1 Cause Of Divorce

I found an interesting verse. . .

“But you have behaved more wickedly than your fathers [they followed other gods and served and worshiped them]. See how each of you is following the stubbornness of his evil heart instead of obeying me.” Jeremiah 16:12

So. . . being stubborn and doing our own thing instead of obeying God. . . is more wicked than idol worship.

And yet, God honors our right to choose to be stubborn.

“But my people would not listen to me. . . would not submit to me. So I gave them over to their stubborn hearts to follow their own devices.” Psalm 81:11-12

It reminds me of the response Jesus gave when questioned about the legality of divorce:

“Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.” Matthew 19:8

What is the #1 cause of divorce?

Well, studies might claim that it is finances, or children with disabilities, or irreconcilable differences, or adultery, or abuse, or addiction, but I am convinced that all divorces are the result of one or two hard, stubborn hearts. Many divorces could be avoided if at least one of the partners would soften their heart, and just do what God commands. . . like love. . . forgive. . . be tenderhearted. . .be kind. . .do all things without complaint. . . in everything give thanks.

Have you hardened your heart and become stubborn? It might lead to bitterness, resentment, unforgiveness, loss. . . divorce.

If you are considering divorce, you should test the hardness of your heart. Can you make an effort to walk in love so that you won’t make a decision that will bring years of hurt, resentment, bitterness and loss for you or your children?

Your marriage challenge for today is a big one: Don’t reject the wisdom and lovingkindness of God; do not follow the stubbornness of your own heart. In His path is blessing, goodness, wisdom and joy. And if this makes you mad. . . and you want to dig in your heels, and pull back against the ties that bind — it might just reveal a little . . . stubbornness! Give in, bend a little, and hit your knees — there is power available through prayer — and strength to overcome our stubbornness!

Bending too,

Have time for some extra verses?

Look up these verses: I John 3:18. . . Ephesians 4:32. . .Philippians 2:14 . . I Thessalonians 5:18. Are you treating your husband like this?
It is natural for children to resist and be stubborn, but we are to grow up and mature past that character flaw. Are there ways that you have held onto immature ways by being stubborn? Can you list the ways that you want to mature by the grace of God?
Are there things that you should seek forgiveness and reconciliation for from your husband? Don’t be too proud to admit your errors, ask for prayer to overcome these weaknesses and walk in maturity and victory!

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About the Author

slpopejoy

Shari Popejoy is the author of the book Won Without Words, and the blog Won Without Words, encouragement to wives. She writes the Livingstone Library, http://livingstonelibrary.com/spknoevil/, an adventure series for young people, and the blog Oh Joy!, http://injoyinc.com/ohjoy/ for busy moms. She is a frequent contributor to Christian print and online magazines, and writes from the quiet country of the Ozarks, where she lives with her husband, Marc, and their three children.