Won Without Words
winning the marriage you desire through wisdom

Shari Popejoy


June 21, 2012

What If My Husband Ignores Me?

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Written by: Shari Popejoy
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Ready for another question in our What If summer series?

What if my husband ignores me?

Ignore him back.

For about an hour. :D

Leave him alone, and go take a long bath, or put on a cute outfit and do some exercise, or curl up with a good book, or make a batch of cookies, or polish your nails. Find something to do that will bring a smile to your face, and a good mood to your heart!

Then, after you’ve had time to enjoy yourself, make a list of five things that you love about your husband. Go find him and tell him that you’ve been thinking of the five things you love most about him, and then tell him at least three of them.

Most of the time your husband isn’t ignoring you on purpose.

He’s concerned about his job, or solving a problem in his head, or worried about something — that might not even concern you. Sometimes he’s consumed with trying to solve a problem, and he has to devote all his mental energies to it. (Men are not multi-taskers when it comes to thinking about big problems.)

It is practically painful when you force a man to talk about what’s bothering him before he’s ready! If you gave him a choice — he might rather have you hit his thumb with a hammer!

The worst thing you can do when your husband is ignoring you, is to assume that it’s about you, and then to precipitate an argument — just to get his attention — so that he’s not ignoring you anymore! (There are a few things worse than being ignored!)

So, give him a little time. When he’s ready, distract him with your loveliness. He can’t ignore that forever!

Or, distract him with the three things you love most about him. That kind of attention is irresistible to a man! And to add to the fun — tell him that in order to get the last two things on your list — you want ______________ [fill in the blank with something he’ll be glad to give you like: a hug, a passionate kiss, a one-minute massage, or a three-item list of his favorite things about you!]

You’ll soon have his attention, and now he can’t get you off his mind!

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About the Author

Shari Popejoy
Shari Popejoy is the author of the book Won Without Words, and the blog Won Without Words, encouragement to wives. She writes the Livingstone Library, an adventure series for young people, and the blog Oh Joy!, (injoyinc.com/oh/) for busy moms. She is a frequent contributor to Christian print and online magazines, and writes from the quiet country of the Ozarks, where she lives with her husband, Marc, and their three children. You can find out all about her at sharipopejoy.com!


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