Although I usually speak to women about the power to change the dynamics of their marriage through the principle of Won Without Words, outlined in I Peter 3, today’s list is for men!
I believe that because of the oneness and unity of marriage, it is possible (through the sacrificial love demonstrated by Christ) for one partner to bring the supernatural power of love, and its potential for restoration and redemption into marriage.
The power of love is not a guarantee to save the marriage, but it is guaranteed to change the one who begins to walk in love!
So, for the men, here’s a list of how you can change your marriage!
Consider These 6 Things that Christ Would Recommend to Men About Marriage
- Avoid hard-heartedness and stubbornness. Matthew 19:8. Stubbornness might just be the #1 Cause of Divorce.
- If it seems your prayers aren’t being answered lately, check how you have been treating your wife. If you don’t show her understanding and honor, your prayers might be hindered. I Peter 3:7. We are instructed to not quench the Holy Spirit, because the Spirit of God is sensitive and holy–just like your wife. Don’t quench the power of God to work in your family and in your home by being harsh with your wife. Picture the Spirit of God hovering just over your wife’s shoulder, and don’t use tones or words or facial expressions that cause God’s Spirit to fade from your home.
- Add to your wife’s beauty. Is your wife not measuring up to your expectations lately? Does she seem to make more mistakes, be lax about her appearance, look a little worn and weary? Consider that it might be in direct proportion to the love you show her. The most beautiful woman in the room is the one whose husband loves her most, a bride made radiant by the love of her husband, washed, cleansed, and redeemed. Just as your wife blooms under your affirmation and compliments, she wilts under your criticism and complaint. Try a day of speaking only good things to her, and see how the day ends! Ephesians 5
- Wash her feet (or give her a good foot rub). A man who knows his authority in Christ can afford to kneel down in service to his wife. John 13:3
- Love as Christ loved (Eph 5:25): laying down his life, seeking the advancement of his followers, washing their feet, humbling himself unto death, turning the other cheek, dying to self in order to provide a better way.
- Don’t treat your wife harshly, but seek to understand her (Col 3:19 and I Peter 3:7) It is easy to damage a woman’s sensitive feelings, causing her to withdraw behind a protective barrier. Treat her gently, and she will remain tender–and you will benefit from the beauty!
Loving as Christ loved is one of the hardest things for marriage partners to do in the sometimes troubled days of ’til death do us part. But in learning to love like Christ, we also participate in the glory that comes after a time of suffering.
Marriage is a glorious gift that God has given. It is a gift that can be opened day after day. Your wife has every gift that will bring you unending delights. Begin to open them up today.