Won Without Words
winning the marriage you desire through wisdom

Shari Popejoy


December 9, 2014

Do Not Disturb

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Written by: Denise Barkdoll
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After having a couple of busy and difficult weeks, I decided that I really, really needed a day to just relax with Robert and do nothing.  I devised a plan to spend a day with my husband – watching TV, eating junk food, and paying as little attention as we could to the outside world and our responsibilities.

First, the snacks.  Robert was in charge.  I think he did well.  Do you see the reduced-fat crackers?  No sense in going crazy with the calories.


Then, I put this sign on our bedroom door:


For the record, we were still available for our children, all teenagers, should an emergency arise, and we did come out of our room off and on throughout the day.

After all, those pizzas weren’t going to cook themselves.

But for the most part, we really did stay tucked away.  We kept our use of social media to a minimum.  We didn’t talk about or do anything important or productive.  We just enjoyed our time together in all of its lazy, relaxed glory.

At some point during the day, when I wasn’t looking, my door sign was replaced with one similar in style, but entirely different in meaning…


This new sign was courtesy of my daughter, Faith.  I love my funny kids.

But isn’t her sign really the reality of it!?  When you are a parent, and a spouse, and a friend – it’s hard to not always be on call.  Whether it’s the tiny people in the next room hollering “Mommy!” or someone trying to connect with you through cyberspace or phone lines, chances are you spend a lot of your time being available, and answering the call of those who need you.  And it is a blessed thing to be able to be there for them.

Sometimes, though, you just need some off duty, down time.  I‘ve come to learn that not only is it okay to take that time,  it is NECESSARY.  Your family will appreciate a recharged you.  Your husband will relish the time the two of you can spend alone.

And that’s what this day was all about: hanging out with my best friend.   It was a wonderful day of the two of us just being us, and it was just what we needed.

In fact, I think we’ll be planning another one of these days again soon.

You should, too!  Stockpile some snack foods, tack a sign on your door, and take a day off.  You deserve it!

<3 Denise

P.S. – If the kids are little, and you don’t have a sitter, you can plan a play day with Mommy and Daddy, instead.  Set the work aside and make fun the priority.   My guess is that you won’t even remember the work that didn’t get done that day :)

About the Author

Denise Barkdoll
My name is Denise, and I am a wife, a mother, a sister, a daughter, an aunt, and a child of God. I think of myself as one of His works-in-progress. My husband, Robert, and I have been married for 23 years and we are the parents of a son and two daughters.


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