I am so excited for you to meet my friend, a real Proverbs 31 Woman, but I hope you’re not too disappointed that I’m going to have to delay our introduction. I had full intentions of unveiling her at the beginning of the series, and then proving to you that she was a Proverbs 31 Woman, by comparing her to the list. . .but I’ve had second thoughts about that.

You see, as women, we are too quick to compare — and our lists can be brutal. Because of our need to measure up, we are constantly comparing ourselves to other women. We have this little scale in our mind and we think, “Am I prettier, smarter, thinner, more educated, more witty?” And whatever arena we have chosen to excel in, that’s where we throw our weight around. . . oops, I know. . . bad metaphor!

It’s just that I’m afraid that if I brought my friend into the room, you might just say, “Well, what’s so special about her?”. . . And you would be right, because there is nothing about her appearance that would really impress you. And then I would have to try to overcome your first impression. . . and I don’t want my friend to be dismissed so easily.

I love her too much to let anyone sum her up, to shrug her off, to compare themselves to her and say, “Well. . . I’ve got her beat.”

Now, I know that no woman would do that on purpose, because we are created to protect and to love and nurture, but as a reaction to how we have been conditioned by our society to meet new women. . . we compare. . .

Really, in your heart, you know how important it is for us, as women to validate each other, and to encourage each other, and to become sister-friends to each other. And I know that you, like me, truly want to be a woman who embraces other women, and doesn’t feel threatened by them.

So, stick with me, my friend, and let’s learn together to value the truly important things that we women desire, like the need for inner beauty, the desire for true intimacy, the appetite for a kindred spirit, the need to be vulnerable and open with other women, without feeling the need to compare, or protect ourselves, or hide behind a mask. . . and most importantly, how to be a woman of noble character to our family, our community, our church, our Lord.

My friend. . . she didn’t know a stranger. She could so easily make a connection to anyone, because she wasn’t hiding anything. She had accepted the truth about herself, was confident about herself, and couldn’t wait to meet a new friend. She would love to meet you already.

One thing the real Proverbs 31 Woman has truly learned — is how to be confident, secure, and comfortable in her own skin.

So, here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to tell you about some of the qualities of the Proverbs 31 woman first, her characteristics, her special unique attributes, her abilities, so that by the time I introduce you to my friend, you will truly recognize her true value and worth. Then you can meet her with honesty and real friendship. . . and perhaps in the journey, you will have become more comfortable in your own skin, too.

Because, what I really want women to acquire in this series — is the knowledge that YOU ARE VALUABLE. You are a treasure. You are a gem. You don’t need to compare yourself with anyone, because you are without compare — an exquisite and rare creation. You have been designed with infinite wisdom. You are fearfully and wonderfully made.

You have gifts that you alone possess, to bestow upon people that you alone can reach, to produce a harvest that you alone can reap.

So wait just a little longer to meet my friend. Are you ready for the first Proverbs 31 Woman quality? Let’s go!


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Won Without Words by Shari Popejoy is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
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